Would you be so kind as to read, rate, and critique the beginning of my story?

It sounds interesting. I like the way you put some of the story in a metaphor. It really sounds cool! But what is the story about? A girl that writes a book? Add a little more flavor. Does something bad happen to her? The way some authors write it is when there is one big idea in the story, with lots of little stories\adventures inside of it. You have potential!